Saturday, January 12, 2013

FILM REVIEW: Storage 24 (2012)


Storage 24  is basically a Syfy original movie with a slightly higher production value. How Magnet chose to distribute something like this while other better films are still in limbo is way beyond our comprehension....but, here we are.

The film opens in one of those storage facilities that you always see populating reality television these days. A setting that seems perfect for some kind of horrific event to occur. There are so many possibilities that a filmmaker could explore in such a place. Every time you land on one of those shows there's always some cool artifact they find or some old antique that someone is bringing to a specialist for an appraisal. And the environments are so claustrophobic, the scenes practically write themselves. You'd think it would be super easy to keep all of the action internal. Only, Storage 24  attempts to bring the horror from the outside.

 
There's some kind of military plane crash nearby and it is soon revealed that some kind of alien being is loose within the storage containers. Suddenly, everything goes on automatic lock down...so, our random occupants are locked inside with this alien being. The premise is simple enough which would allow for a talented group of filmmakers to come in and create something really entertaining and enjoyable. Only...not so much.
 
It's pretty much shit that we've already seen many times over told through a lackluster directing style. Johannes Roberts has directed mediocre stuff before that usually teases at being better than it actually ends up being. And he's back with his same brand of mediocrity. That's not to say that the film is altogether bad. It's just painfully dull.
 
The gore is actually really well done...when it's not CGI. There are really cool shots of face-ripping and disemboweling that truly puts the film a couple of notches above the aforementioned Syfy fare. Sadly, that's not enough to save the entirety of the film from riding off the proverbial rails. It's not exactly a gorefest...but, the FX is pretty decent whenever it calls for it.
 
 
The acting is actually not too bad, either. It's just a shame that most of the talent is wasted on annoying and poorly written characters that beg to be killed. The characters that ultimately survive at the end of the film didn't match up to my initial picks. I won't go into spoiler territory...but, let's just say that some of the wrong people end up living. Personally, I wouldn't have minded if the entire cast didn't make it the the finish line. Well, with the exception of Ned Dennehy and Laura Haddock. Their natural charisma made their particular characters bearable enough to where I was actually rooting for them. However, the poor script writing only hindered each performance and the dialogue never really flowed with the tone of the film. There's some funny stuff mixed with some deadpan awkward stuff that created a sort of moody feel to the whole thing which really came off a bit jarring.

The monster itself wasn't all that special. Sometimes a film will come out that kind of sucks...but, it still goes down as a classic due to the awesomeness of the creature. Rawhead Rex  immediately comes to mind when I think of such a film. I loved the hell out of Rawhead Rex....only for the actual monster. The rest of the film is almost unwatchable....but, whenever Rex shows up...it's cinematic gold. In this film...the bug-like creature feels like a half-assed design that was mashed up with elements from other films.
 
Storage 24  is your run-of-the-mill science fiction monster movie filled with tiny high points and irritating characters written solely for the convenience of the film. It's not really all bad...it's just mostly bad.

 
 
 
 



Laura Haddock? Yes, Please!
 


 

Thanks for reading,

bryan.





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